and, of course, who is this?

Sarah Goodin Barrett MOULTON was born in Jamaica in 1783 to a plantation family. This was painted by Thomas Lawrence in 1794, a few days before she left to complete her education in England. One source said she died shortly after the painting-- but that isn't consistent (ie, isn't on wikipedia and a couple other places).

Sarah's brother, Edward, went on to own the painting. His other claim to fame is his daughter: Elizabeth Barrett Browning. 

(BTW, Blue Boy was done by another artist many many years later, and there's no relation between the paintings except that they hang and are associated together).

I am really diggin this writer theme-- it occurs on both sides of my genetic contributors. I suppose I need to head to the genealogical compound pretty soon.

in the balm and blossoming

i am working on a series of vignettes, one of which involves some pretty intensive research into utah history, of which i know very little. this has resulted in a series of brief road-trips to small towns around salt lake (like the monastery in huntsville), to mormon meccas around salt lake (like the beehive house, the church history museum, and the temple), and outdoor sites like the great salt lake. part of this is a grand farewell to SLC and Utah, and part of this is research for the story. and part of it is just a lot of fun: feet on the dashboard, loud/obscure music, salt and vinegar potato chips/cheetos, coffee, and views from cars.

one of the best ways to figure out where you came from is to figure out where you're going-- or where they went-- or reverse that-- either way, the answer is cemeteries. always go to cemeteries, no matter where you visit or how much time you have.

(maybe some day i will tell you all my guanajuato, mexico cemetery stories).

(also: read this).

something about Utah that is never talked about, especially by people that aren't from Utah, is polygamy. oh wait, that's wrong, it's actually all that's ever talked about with Utah. but, if you're from Utah, you can give them the terminology speech: polygyny means a man taking more than one wife, polyandry means a woman taking more than one husband, and polygamy is a blanket term for plural marriage of any kind. then squint at them like they're idiots... then when they ask how you know so much about this, tell them you're from Utah. checkmate!

here's a polygamist grave. below the patriarch's name are the smaller names of 2 wives, and then the names of unattributed children. 

a lot of this research has gone to pretty strange places (almost literally-- literally as of early summer). there's this place called Mormon Row in the Tetons. Situated in Mormon Row is something called Moulton Barn-- it's pretty much the most photographed barn in the world. it's in my genealogical history (obviously). i'm still sorting out how-- something like my father's great-grandfather-- who came from England and then in a "green" and shoddy handcart which broke down in Wyoming. i'm still researching this, but it's sort of like the plymouth rock story of utah history (and mountain meadows is Utah's revolutionary war). pretty big deal.

so today i was doing a little more research for the second half of this story, and i was looking into a man named Porter Rockwell. he was sort of an angel-of-death assassin for church leaders. i won't go into it here, mainly because i'm getting tired.

anyway, this badass mofo was told by Old Joe Smith that if he never cut his hair no bullet could harm him (thanks wiki! i'll cross check that later). but porter heard of a widow going bald from typhoid fever, i read (on wiki), so he cut that hair and made her a wig. that widow's name was Agnes Coolbrith Smith Pickett, a widow of Old Joe Smith's brother Don Carlos (and then later, Old Joe himself... then, i think, after that, his cousin). she was also the mother of Ina Coolbrith, the first poet laureate of the state of California. 

well, i thought this to be a lovely story, so i followed the trail. turns out that Agnes's other full name is Agnes MOULTON Coolbrith. so... i'll be looking into that one a bit more. 

here she is:

after Agnes decided she was sick of polygamy (POLYGYNY!) and what, quite frankly, sounds like a deadwood-level orgy, she decided to high-tail it for california with her daughter, Josephine Donna Smith (who soon changed her name-- some say to hide from her polyg/mormon roots, others say to write under, to Ina Coolbrith). 

she is rumored to be the first white child to enter California (in 1850). She went on to befriend Mark Twain and tutor Jack London, and was the poet laureate till she died.

It's O my heart, my heart!

to be out in the sun and sing;

to sing and shout in the fields about,

in the balm and blossoming.

lean on me.

this morning i woke up around 5 am having all the bizarre symptoms a CVS episode is sure to bring.  it had been a year or two since this had happened to me, so not only was it really painful and unpleasant, it came with the fear and anxiety of being unpracticed at it, and the sorrow of having to go through it again after it had been so long. 

i was sick from about 5am until 10:30am, give or take, so the episode was rather short and mellow. in terms of pain, intensity, and frequency of everything that when down this morning, it was about a 4-6 on a 10 point scale. my greatest comfort was feeling that it wasn't as bad as it had been, and could have been.

my second greatest comfort was strawBeary.

made by Cristina Gunn, of crate lung fame, and given to me to celebrate our safe and triumphant return, strawBeary has been on my bed ever since. on particularly lonely, cold, or sad nights, we cuddle while i fall asleep. 

strawBeary was with me through this whole thing. in between spells, when i was able to fall asleep for a bit, i would hold it [we don't believe in gender constrictions] close and fall asleep. 

thanks strawBeary! (and cristie). 

watch for creations by cristina gunn on crate lung's [coming soon] etsy page, and of course, on the road. maybe you too can have a new friend like mine. 

(also, i did have animate friends and family in the house.... and that helped too).